cookies I

this is my latest project: oatmeal raisin cookies. i just borrowed a recipe from the web but since there were many ingredients which were not available in our kitchen -- plus we don't have a 'real' oven -- i improvised a lot. the result? just okay but could be better. next time i'll do this, i'll also mix in nuts.

adobo ala tisha

whether it's a filipino or a japanese version, it's still my favorite chicken-pork adobo. as i had ran out of soy sauce, i improvised and used indonesia's sweet soy sauce. still and all, masarap pa rin sya kahit medyo naiba sa usual recipe ko.

ingredients:

chicken breast (chopped to medium-sized cubes...kasi mas masarap kung maliliit para absorb agad ang sauce)
pork (ganun din ang size ng cut)
vinegar
soy sauce
garlic (crushed)
peppercorn
laurel leaves
salt to taste
cooking oil

in a deep pan, mix all ingredients except soy sauce and cooking oil. let the ingredients boil in medium fire. simmer. when most of the vinegar has already been absorbed by the meat, pour soy sauce. simmer. in a separate pan, heat cooking oil. scoop the meat from its sauce and fry. scoop back the fried meat in its original sauce. let the adobo simmer in very, very low fire.

**i can't give the exact measurement of the ingredients as everything is tantiyahan when i cook adobo. and importante for me is to let the meat absorb the vinegar first bago ilagay ang soy sauce. for me, adobo is all about vinegar, pampakulay lang ang soy sauce. the longer it simmers in a very low fire, the yummier this recipe gets. ako kasi mas gusto ko ang tuyong adobo; yung nagmamantika tapos nagdi-disintegate ang meat when you scoop it from the bowl. ;)

if this can fly...

if you're bored and nothing much is happening around you, what will you do? me, i went biking around kodaira city, did some grocery-shopping and watched the latest episode of "ikaw ang lahat sa akin." when the sun was about to set, i felt the inevitable pangs of hunger. what was next? hehehe...we just had a tummy-filling dinner of chicken lollipops. i cooked. ;)

ingredients:

chicken wings
flour
dried basil
oregano
pepper
salt
egg

***scrape off the meat to one end to form a "lollipop." mix dry ingredients together. beat the egg. dredge the fleshy tip of each "lollipop" in the flour mixture, dip in eggs and then dredge again in flour. form a meat ball at the end of the bone. deep fry until golden brown. yummier to eat with sweet chili sauce.

pancakes galore

i had this problem i've been trying to solve the past week. what will i do with the bag of flour that was sitting idly on our kitchen shelf? then i thought about making pancakes. my dilemma was, the last time i made pancakes from scratch was like a decade ago already. i surfed the web and found the easiest recipe i could probably whip up. the result? a batch of soft and creamy pancakes. i should have been happy with the result -- my flatmate was -- only, i remembered that my original recipe was fluffier and more cakey. anyway, this recipe was not so bad either. ;)

abandoned province...

This is a letter written by Wens Jomao-as to the Philippine Daily Inquirer, published today, May 26. I chanced upon this page while I was bored and thinking of writing something about my childhood years in U.E.P., a university town in Northern Samar. I am posting this in my blog -- with proper acknowledgement, of course -- because Wens asked the same questions all of us, Nortehanons, have been perennially asking all these years.

EVERY TIME I read articles about provinces where tourist spots abound and are being developed, and the people are being praised to high heavens for their hospitality, it pains me so much. Why? Because the province of Northern Samar where I come from is not wanting of this virtue, and yet it is never given the limelight except when the New People’s Army stage an ambush, kill soldiers and policemen, and ransack a town in the province, carting away high-powered guns.
I’ve asked myself: Is our province so depressed and God-forsaken that not one tourist spot catches the attention of the concerned authorities?

We also have representatives and a governor. But why is Samar so neglected? Our province is not without a tourist spot that can be developed. We have places that can put our province in the ranks of provinces with beautiful tourist destinations like Bohol, Cebu, Palawan, Pangasinan and Aklan (Boracay), to mention a few.

Again, I ask: What are the priorities of our representatives and governor? Is it the welfare of the province or self-aggrandizement? Your guess is as good as mine.

Where did their pork barrel allocations go that, in the last 15 years, not even one farm-to-market road has been constructed? What really are their priorities in clinging to their positions?

Are Samareños happy with the present situation? Look how our public officials have neglected and abandoned Northern Samar. Before martial law, during the incumbency of the late Rep. Eladio T. Balite, the port of San Jose was converted into a national port of entry. This is now an abandoned port and the water is very shallow that not a single passenger ship can dock at the port.

During martial law, the Del Valle brothers were in command and control of Northern Samar, courtesy of Jose Roño. The younger Del Valle was appointed as governor and, later, ran for assemblyman. His elder brother ran for governor and won, but not a single project was constructed except the cementing of the streets of their town of San Jose.

After martial law, Raul Daza came back to claim his old position as representative, holding on to it for nine years without anything to show for it. While he was in Congress, Harlen Abayon served as governor (also nine long years). After their third terms, they switched positions: Daza is now the governor and Abayon is the representative.

After 15 long years of the Daza-Abayon tandem, Northern Samar is still not thriving but sinking deeper into the quagmire of misfortune brought about by sheer neglect and abandonment. Who’s to blame for this?

Puto recipe

For those who love puto but can't seem to find time to do it, here's an easy recipe which proved to be useful and delicious. this helped me cope with my longing for anything filipino here in tokyo. easy to prepare, easy to cook. you can even experiment on toppings.

Ingredients:

2 cups all purpose flour
2 tablespoons baking powder
1 cup white sugar
1 cup evaporated milk
1 cup water
pinch of salt
cheese cut into strips

Mix all dry ingredients together, slowly add milk, mix till all ingredients are well blended. Add water gradually so it won't splatter. When thoroughly blended, pour into small plastic molders. Top with cheese strips. You can also add a slice of salted egg as topping if you want. Steam for 15-20 minutes. Eat with gusto!

***to check on how this puto looks like, look at the picture below. :)

it is my dream that one day i'll open a small cafe. i've really learned to cook and here are some of the dishes i've learned to whip up. must be yummy as they were attacked before we remembered to take pictures of them. :)

question!

hay buhay...ano kaya mangyayari sa akin pagbalik ko sa 'pinas? pati si gary napahiga tuloy sa putik.

anak ng jueting!

after working briefly for jinggoy estrada eons ago, i cannot help but be cynical about the arroyo administration's stand against jueting.

first, jinggoy estrada -- then a first son and mayor of san juan, now senator -- was not exactly the epitome of a spotless gentleman, much less an ideal public servant. i was witness how his office was transformed into a veritable film production company, with numerous stuntmen and movie extras littering along the corridors of san juan's municipal building. too, there were the philipp (with double p at the end of his given name, i was reminded) salvadors, the bong revillas and the rudy fernandezs who would drop by everytime they felt like playing tong-its. and then, there was i, of course, silently waiting in one corner for further instructions on when to visit the set of estrada's movie. i would sometimes jerk from my stupor when i hear comments like "pare, masarap si ara mina" or "pare, nadale mo ba?" from my boss and his friends. naturally, my already cynical view about powerful but incompetent politicians was further reinforced by experiences like this.

how can i be sure that mikee arroyo -- a showbiz denizen as well -- will be any different? are there any indicators to show that he has not taken the same path as jinggoy? as of this writing, showbiz and political grapevine is not so reassuring.

second, working in one of the government's most controversial, yet politically vital, agencies has brought me closer to the seat of power -- close enough for me to get a good glimpse of what takes place after the curtain falls.

case # 1: one day i was asked to attend a meeting with a presidential adviser (whom i refuse to name here) to discuss a possible ad project for GMA. go i did. after several meetings in various cafes of posh hotels, we finally came up with a concept. marilou diaz-abaya was to direct the series of advertisement that will highlight government projects, in an effort to sell GMA to the masses. budget ran around seven figures, so each concerned government agency had to financially contribute to its fruition. to make the long story short, the project was launched and was quite successful in the sense that the ads came out so much different from your usual government adverts. unfortunately for GMA, her bit exposure there did nothing to endear her to the masses.

case # 2: my boss used to tell me that he was being harrassed by the people of the first gentleman. day and night, they would ask for favors that were detrimental to the agency. in the end, my boss paid dearly for his continuous refusal to give in. barely two years into his job, he was literally sacked. this happened even as malacanang announced that he resigned.

case # 3: during the last presidential elections, my agency contributed millions to GMA's campaign coffers; not in the form of cash, of course, but in the form of billboards along the north and south expressways. these billboards were so huge they put to shame kris aquino's along edsa.

my point is, how can this administration proclaim sincerity in eradicating graft and corruption, illegal gambling, even petty crimes, when it has not been honest right from the start? what about the worms that fill the bureaucracy? and i am not even talking about presidential relatives yet. can i really believe in a president whose main preoccupation right from the start has been to beautify herself?

you tell me.

para kay isko...

Pitong bagay sa buhay na natutunan ko sa U.P
ni PROF. RYAN CAYABYAB (Commencement speech given on April 24 before the Class of 2005)

Maraming salamat po, magandang hapon po sa inyong lahat. UP President Emerlinda Roman, former presidents Jose Abueva and Noel Soriano, UP Diliman Chancellor Dr. Sergio Cao, the Board of Regents, U.P.faculty and administrative staff, co-professors from the College of Music, classmates from UP High 1970, fellow alumni, graduates, and friends: Malugod kong binabati kayong mga nagsisipagtapos ngayong taong 2005. Isang karangalan ang pagtayo ko dito upang maghatid ng isang talumpati para sa inyo.

Huwag kayong mag-alala, maiksi lamang ang aking sasabihin. Kinikilala kong ako ay isang mamamayan ng UP. Unang nasilayan ng aking mga mata ang sinag ng araw sa Area 1, UP Campus, sa may likuran ng Infirmary, kung saan din nanirahan sina Wilfrido Ma. Guerrero, si NVM Gonzales, si Jovita Fuentes, si Jose Maceda, at ang mga Lansang, mga Manalang, mga Daza, Cailao, Lesaca, Estrada at marami pang ibang mga pioneering faculty members ng UP Diliman.

Ang nanay ko ay nagturo sa UP College of Music. Apat kaming magkakapatid na lumaki sa sariwang hangin ng Area 1, nanghuhuli ng tutubi at kuliglig sa araw, kulisap naman sa gabi. Diyes ang Coca-cola, singko ang Cosmos. Minsan sa isa o makalawang linggo, may dumaraang truck ng DDT (Dichlorodiphenyltrichloroethane) na nag-bubuga ng makapal na usok pampatay ng lamok na nagdudulot ng malaria. Lahat ng bata sa Area 1, at sa buong campus ay sinasalubong itong truck, at kung kaya lang naming magsiawit ng Haleluya noon ay ginawa na namin dahil para kami lahat nasa ulap, nagtatakbuhan, hinahabol at nilalanghap ang maputi at mabangong usok ng DDT truck. Napakasaya namin. Walang nagsabi sa amin na hindi lamang lamok ang pinapatay ng DDT. Ngayong malalaki na kami at nagbibiruan ang aming egroup na Area 1, napagkasunduan namin na dahil sa DDT na yan, bawat isa sa amin ay may bahid ng kabaliwan, depende sa dami ng nalanghap na DDT.

Marami kaming laro noon sa Area 1 patintero, tumbang preso, siyato, lastiko, gagamba, luksong tinik, step-no, habulan, taguan, teks at holen, na sa palagay ko ay sasabihin ninyong napakalow-tech kumpara sa mga laro ninyo nung kayo'y mga bata. Meron kaming mga sikretong tawagan, sipol at huni. Ang dami kong nais ikuwento tungkol sa aking pagkabata ngunit mauubos ang ating oras. Nag-aral ako sa UP Elementary School at sa UP High School. Matagal na panahon ding diyes lamang ang bayad sa IKOT.

Saan pa ba ako magkokolehiyo kundi sa UP rin. Una akong pumasok bilang accounting major sa UP College of Business Administration. Sa kabutihang palad, nauntog ako at na-realize ko na ako ay hindi pala maalam sa pagbibilang ng pera. Tinanggap ako at lumipat sa UP College of Music bilang isang piano major. Nauntog na naman ako at natanto ko na ako ay nagpapanggap lamang na isang Cecil Licad. Mabuti naman at tinanggap ako ng Department of Composition and Theory. Sa maniwala kayo't hindi, tinapos ko itong kurso, Bachelor of Music Major in Composition suma suma-sampong taon bago ko nakuha ang aking diploma. Aba! Naniwala pa sila sa akin at kinuha akong guro. Dito ko nakilala ang isa kong estudiyanteng napakaganda na una kong naging barkada sa kainan at kantahan, nauwi rin sa simbahan. Halos dalawampung taon din ako nagturo sa UP College of Music.

Wala pang tatlong taon na ako ay nagbitiw bilang isang assistant professor; akala ko'y doon na ang katapusan ng aking koneksyon sa UP. Hindi pala, dahil ngayon ang aking panganay ay kasalukuyang isang university scholar sa College of Music.

Mababaw at maikling kasaysayan lamang ito. Gayon pa man, kasaysayan pa rin. Para sa akin, napakahalaga ng aking nakalipas at ito ay lagi kong babalik-balikan. Habang ako ay papalayo ng papalayo sa aking pinanggalingan, palalim nang palalim ang mga ugat na aking tinatanim, sinisiguro ko lamang na hindi ako maitutumba ng kahit ano mang malakas na bagyo o delubyo na sa buhay ko ay sasapit.

Ngayon, nakita n'yo kung bakit napaka-halaga ng UP sa aking buhay, sana ay maging sa inyo rin. Kahit hindi ninyo na nasisilayan ang oblation, at hindi na naririnig ang karilyon, nawa'y nasa puso at isipan lagi ang paaralang kumupkop at nagpalawak ng isip ng bawat isa sa inyo. Naituro na lahat ng maituturo sa inyo ng inyong mga guro. Alam naman natin na ang bawa't isa sa atin ay may natatanging angking galing. Walang halaga ito kung hindi ninyo gagamitin para sa ikabubuti at ikauunlad ng inyong komunidad, ng inyong pamilya at ng buong sambayanan.

Itanghal ninyo ang inyong pagiging Pilipino na nag-aral sa U.P. kahit saan kayo mapadpad. Meron lang akong dagdag na pabaon sa inyo para lalong di nyo malimutan, ang UP nating mahal. Ito ang pitong mga bagay-bagay tungkol sa buhay na natutunan ko sa U.P.:

1. Ang buhay ay parang IKOT jeep. Ang iyong patutunguhan ay siya ring iyong pinanggalingan.
2. U.P. lang ang may TOKI, sa buhay wala nito. Pero nasasaiyo na yon kung nais mong pabaligtad ang takbo ng buhay mo.

3. Sa IKOT, puede kang magkamali ng baba kahit ilang beses, sasakay ka lang uli. Sa buhay, kapag paikot-ikot ka na at laging mali pa rin ang iyong baba, naku, may sayad ka.

4. Sa U.P., lahat tayo magaling. Aminin nating lahat na tayo'y magagaling. Ang problema dun, lahat tayo magaling!

5. Kung sa U.P. ay sipsip ka na, siguradong paglabas mo, sipsip ka pa rin.

6. Sa U.P., tulad sa buhay, ang babae at ang lalake, at lahat ng nasa gitna, ay patas, walang pinagkaiba sa dunong, sa talino, sa pagmamalasakit, sa kalawakan ng isipan, sa pag-iibigan; at kahit na rin sa kabaliwan, sa kalokohan at sa katarantaduhan. At ang panghuli:

7. Sa U.P. tulad sa buhay, bawal ang overstaying.

Maraming salamat po! Mayroon pa akong isang huling pabaon, galing sa puso ko - para rin sa mga puso ninyo, ito ang napili kong paraan upang maisalarawan ang tema ngayong hapon: "Angking Galing Para sa Sambayanan". Ito ay isang awiting nilikha ko at ng aking kakaklase sa high school na nagtapos din ng kolehiyo sa U.P., aking musika sa titik ni Ome Candazo, sa tulong ng mga kaibigan ko sa San Miguel Master Chorale at San Miguel Philharmonic Orchestra na pawang mga alumni ng U.P.

Sa 'yo UP maraming salamat
Ikaw na aking tahanan
Mula sa aking pagkamulat
Hanggang sa aking huling hininga

Sa 'yo UP maraming salamat
Ang iyong mga aral ang aking gabay
Baon ko ito sa paglalakbay
Hanggang mapanaw ang buhay

Kami'y lumaki sa iyong pag- iingat
Natutong mag aral, natutong magsaya
Dulot mo ay init tuwing kami ay nagiginaw
Sa lahat ng panahon bigay mo'y pagasa

Sa 'yo UP maraming salamat
Ang iyong mga aral ang aking gabay
Baon ko ito sa paglalakbay
Hanggang mapanaw ang buhay

bro and i

ditto and i -- we were clowning around in our apartment.

blogging and me

i can't understand it. at times when i need to concentrate on doing 'serious' stuff in life, i go the other way to do the mundane. just as when i have to dive into life-changing matters, i find all the excuses in the world to procrastinate. i am a perfect study of contradictions, ain't i?

this blogging thing is my latest 'excuse' to dawdle. heck, i enjoy it so much that i keep on forgetting i still have a thesis to iron out. thanks to boris, i discovered the exciting world of collaging pictures. now there's more excuse to dilly-dally.

then again, life is too short to be taken for granted; that even amid all the chaos of thesis writing, i always find a way to brighten up my day. isn't this what life is all about anyway?

barno in focus

my pretty flatmate's collage. folks, here's barno from uzbekistan!!! :))

best friends

my bestfriends, connie and gigi. taken when we had dinner at gigi's house in makati last march. my brother, jippi, was with us.

ditto and leah when we went to tagaytay last march...

incompetent practices...

hay naku, inis na naman ako. actually, matagal ko nang kinaiinisan ito, medyo nawala lang sa isip ko when i went home. pero nag-come up ulit today. ganito kasi yun.

yung sister-in-law ko, si leah, nag-apply sa business world as proofreader. she took the exams and underwent interviews. isang araw, tinawagan sya ng BW to report kasi tanggap na daw sya. pagdating nya sa office, biglang sinabi ng isang taga-personnel na a few minutes ago (lang!), napansin daw nila na undergraduate pala si leah. (she took up comm arts sa u.p.l.b. but stopped going to school for a while for personal reasons...balik aral sya this sem.) pero since pumasa nga sya, binigyan sya ng caritas application form tsaka small bottles for the medical check up. umuwi na si leah. bigla na naman syang tinawagan na pag-uusapan pa daw yung case nya ng personnel department. fast forward, monday the following week, leah got a call from BW saying na di daw talaga sila nag-a-accept ng undergraduate. in other words, di pala siya puwede. sorry na lang.

the thing that pisses me off is not that leah was turned down. ang kinaiinis ko is tinawagan pa sya na pumasa sya at pinaasa, yun pala dahil lang sa pagiging incompetent ng personnel staff ng BW who may have overlooked that supposedly crucial information in her application form, di rin pala sya pupuwede.

i wrote the higher ups of BW but only the editor replied. sabi nya titingnan nya kung ano talaga nangyari. this was more than a month ago. kahapon, dahil nga wala akong magawa, i followed up the case. eto ang sagot sa akin:

Dear Ms. de la Rosa,

As I promised you, I looked into the matter, and discussed the same with our HR head, Mr. Anthony Cuaycong. And based on what I gathered, it was the head of the recruiting department, in this case, Editorial, who "rejected" the application of your friend. Personnel processes applications and, as far it is concerned, it doesn't matter whether or not the applicant has a college degree. As long as the applicant meets the set criteria and passes the required examinations. it will process such application and pass the same on to the department in need of new personnel. It is up to the head of the recruiting department to accept or reject such applicants.

If you need further details, please don't hesitate to get in touch with Mr. Cuaycong. He can be reached via e-mail at cuaycong@bworld.com.ph.

RONNIE ROMERO

yan ang sagot sa akin. hindi ko alam kung sino ang nagsisinungaling sa kanila ng personnel department but one thing i am sure of, the only reason they gave leah for not accpeting her was she's an undergraduate. hellooo...pinasa nya ang exams and interviews ano. sa inis ko, i replied like this:

dear mr. romero,

thank you so much for your quick reply. it was very much appreciated.

however, i would like to point out that there had to have been some mix up of information here between the editorial and personnel departments.

first of all, your personnel department DID call ms. leah amores and told her to report to your office because she was already accepted for the post she was applying for. second, does your personnel department make it a habit to give caritas application form and small bottles for medical check up to applicants who have not passed your qualifications? because ms. amores received those. i just think this is a weird and misleading practice. third, and for the record, somebody from BW called ms. amores up at home, right after she picked up the caritas form and the bottles, to tell her to just hold for a while because the personnel department suddenly found out that she was an undergraduate, after all. the caller promised ms. amores that she will call back the moment they resolve the case -- the latest of which, the caller said, was friday that week because the boss apparently was out on seminar or something. i know this kind of call did transpire because i was there with ms. amores when this happened. fourth, the same caller from BW did not contact ms. amores that friday as promised, but called her monday the following week to tell her that she was sorry but BW does not accept undergraduate applicants for any position, and that it never has or something to that effect. whether that caller was lying or just making an excuse is beyond us now.

mr. romero, i don't know what the personnel department has told you but i asked ms. amores to keep the caritas application form and the small bottles for evidence, in case nobody will believe her case.

as it is, i hope that this won't happen again and i do sincerely hope that those responsible for this mistake that caused my friend so much anguish and humiliation will get their just punishment. if mr. anthony cuaycong was not aware of ms. amores' case and has been told about it only now, then i think he has some fixing up to do in his department. i hope he finds time to check on his incompetent staff because this may happen over and over again if not corrected right away.

i know this is an unfair world, and it should not be further exacerbated by unjust practices especially from the world in which i used to proudly belong -- the media.

respectfully yours,
tisha pia de la rosa

hay naku, sabi nga ng editor ko sa mr&ms puwede daw silang i-demanda sa ginawa nilang yun ano! kakainis talaga.

summer hideaway

another place i'd like to re-visit is sonia's garden in tagaytay city. this picture shows one of its unique resting places where one can watch the moon and the stars while lying down.

my beloved archipelago

my job back home allowed me to travel around the philippines for free. being an editor of our corporate publication, i got to be invited to various places from luzon to mindanao. in retrospect, i have already covered all the 14 regions, with the mindanao regions topping my list of favorites.

let me start with luzon. a personal favorite is sagada for its hanging coffins and the sumaguing cave; not to mention its cool climate. from there, i want to go down to the warm beaches of la union where i spent some of the most memorable days of my life.

in the visayas, boracay will always be my "only one." its white powdery sand and pristine waters are simply incomparable. even now when people say that boracay has already lost its charm, there is still nothing like its white sand which remains cool to the skin, no matter what time of day. boracay is paradise -- bar none.

mindanao, my mindanao...i cannot forget the bright-colored clothes, the sweetest and most exotic of fruits and the people of mindanao. this is one island group i will never tire of visiting. zamboanga -- with its diverse and colorful culture -- comes to mind easily. lake sebu has also found a niche in my heart.

i love traveling. in the philippines, i've been to major cities -- cabanatuan, batangas, tacloban, cebu, iloilo, roxas, davao, and cagayan de oro, to name a few -- several times already. yet, the places i remember best are those that remain unaffected by their beauty and whose people are warm and welcoming.

if there are three more places i have always dreamed of visiting, they are -- in chronological order: batanes, tawi-tawi and bohol. in 2002, i almost had the chance of visiting batanes but political circumstances in the country prevented me from doing so. the same happened to my tawi-tawi trip. bohol has to be a personal sojourn, but it is another story to tell.

suffice it to say that the philippines is truly a blessed archipelago. i just hope to be able to hop into each one of those 7,100+ islands. perhaps this can wait till i go back from tokyo.

want to hitch??? :)))

chef moi!

i did not know when exactly did i learn to cook. i only know that i became totally into it when i came to tokyo. i had to learn, otherwise i would have starved. i mean, i could not go on eating at KFC and McDo forever.

my first attempt at cooking was a disaster. it was the summer when i was 13 and our helper was on vacation. my father told me to cook rice for lunch. i did, i did...but my first try was like burnt congee. of course we had no rice cooker at that time and i knew that i was not cooking arroz caldo, so just watching my disastrous experiment was enough to bring me to tears. before my father arrived from work though, i buried my first experiment at the backyard and called one of our neighbors to help me cook another batch. to this day, my father does not know what lay buried behind our kitchen door. :)

during my home economics subject in high school, we were taught to bake sponge cake using a big cauldron. needless to say, i had to ask one of my friends to do mine for me and it turned out to be just perfect.

my brother, who was a genius in the kitchen...and in any other art he was involved in, used to shoo me away from the kitchen whenever he would bake. i had to follow, otherwise he would stop whatever it was that he was doing.

when i started living alone in manila, my daily sustenance came from jollibee, mcdonalds or wendy's. i would dabble in making pancakes or omelet but my self-confidence never extended to recipes with more than three ingredients.

i once made a romantic dinner for a special someone. i decorated my apartment with lots of candles and flowers. i had the perfect table setting, coupled with soothing music. the menu? it's wendy's salad for appetizer, rack's baby back ribs for the main dish, and red ribbon's yummy chocolate cake for dessert. hey, i had to get an 'A' for my effort too, plus i did cook rice in the rice cooker.

those traumatic cooking experiences did not deter me from experimenting in the kitchen. in tokyo most especially, i began to love tinkering with pots and pans. i started with several breakfast dishes, went on to try making snacks...until gradually i learned to cook the yummiest adobo in town (promise), a mean sinigang, the tastiest salmon lumpia ever, a mouth-watering tuna steak and lots of other gastronomic delights. i still haven't mentioned my soft scrambled eggs that melt in the mouth, have i?

ahhh...boy, practice does make it perfect!

the seemingly irreversible state of nothingness

hay naku...wala na naman talaga akong magawa. nakakabato. nakakatamad. at lalong nakakainis. the reason why i am inis is because wala nga akong magawa kundi mag-complain ng mag-complain na wala akong ginagawa. gosh! i don't think i even make sense. sumasakit na ang ulo ko sa katutunganga ever!

di naman sa wala akong dapat gawin. sa totoo lang, andyan pa yung thesis ko na di pa nagagalaw since ibinalik ng adviser ko nung isang araw. hindi naman major ang corrections pero dapat ko pa ring gawin. pero, grabe, mas gusto ko pang tumingin sa malayo at magmunimuni. hahaha.

baliw na nga siguro ako. heto nga't TH na ring magsulat sa tagalog. napaka-pathetic ko talaga ngayon. di ko alam kung ano gusto kong gawin. i want to write but wala namang pumapasok sa utak ko. gusto kong umuwi ulit sa pinas, pero para ano??? waaa...ayoko na rin nung init dun. di ako makahinga.

siguro, saturated na nga ako. whatever that means, di ko alam. basta feeling ko ngayon, ang hina-hina ng reflexes ko, ang bagal-bagal kong kumilos...at ayokong mag-isip. hanggang kelan kaya akong ganito?

hay naku, buti na lang nagba-blog sila boris at gary. at least, naaaliw ako. hehehe. gawin daw bang entertainment! ah basta...bahala na. sana, i'll wake up from this untimely stupor. i cannot afford to be like this till october.

trouble in paradise

the past few days have been very critical in uzbekistan. this captured my interest as barno -- my flatmate here in tokyo -- comes from tashkent, the country's capital. through barno's animated stories, i've become fascinated with this former USSR country.

uzbekistan is a developing country ruled by an autocrat, islam karimov. according to barno, people have no freedom, the press is highly controlled by the government, poverty is rampant in the countryside, and hopelessness hovers around. and yet, it is still a beloved country to more or less 25 million people.

at this point, the uzbeks are scared of the future. if karimov stays, then nothing changes. if he is removed from power, what is the alternative? who will succeed him? better yet, who can succeed him? uzbekistan does not have an organized opposition party. the country has yet to find an educated and charismatic leader that can rally its people to progress. the future, indeed, looks bleak. either road they take, the uzbeks feel like they're on the losing end.

i cannot help but remember my country. we were used to be ruled by the conjugal dictatorship of ferdinand and imelda marcos. when they were kicked out of power, things only went from bad to worse. short of painting a grim reality, i can only say that given our abundant natural and human resources, we could have done better.

i can only pray that the situation in uzbekistan will soon stabilize. i pray that the little bekshas and timurs and all the other children will live to see a free and prosperous country. in time.

in the philippines, we still dare to hope. we still dare to dream. after all, these are the only non-taxable stuff in my country.

can i keep the ball rollin'?

if boredom can kill, i'd have been long dead by now.

since i came back from manila, i have done nothing but stare at the ceiling, look out of the window, or sleep. not even the suggestion of my adviser to re-organize my data has broken this seemingly pathetic existence.

i just don't care about my thesis anymore. i no longer wish to sprint to the finish line. horror of all horrors, i may even have to crawl to my graduation. i just feel like a huge useless blob that's waiting to be rolled. :(

it's at times like this when i wish i am filthy rich so i can just pack my things and visit nepal or south africa. if i have lots of moolah, i can go shopping at cheap shops in thailand or china. better yet, i can vacation in one of those exotic pacific islands where i can swim to my heart's content.

then again, i am just a student in japan, wistfully longing for my thesis to mysteriously fix itself. i swear i will do it when my mood sets in. i just don't know when that will occur. i'll pray. i really will.

of wedding bells and reality check

my last trip to manila was definitely an eye-opener: soaring prices of commodities, stifling heat in a polluted environment, apalling apathy of public officials, unpunished crimes, uncertain future...what the heck, everything seemed to be pulling me down the vortex.

i was ready to plunge into depression and hopelessness when my brother suddenly perked me up by announcing that he was getting married. did i hear it correctly? my baby brother getting hitched? my eyes grew as round as saucers they almost popped out of their sockets! why, oh, why? i mean, it's not that we were not expecting it. in fact, everybody in the family was pushing him to marry leah. they have been living together under one roof for nearly two years now, anyway. but why now? simple. nobody's watching.

my brother is just soooo like me. he hates it when people pressure him to do something. the more he's pushed, the harder he'll try to walk to opposite way. and so, when everybody was not looking, he grabbed leah's hand and wed her in a civil ceremony. i suddenly became witness no. 1, while leah's older sister was witness no. 2. the secrecy was a mutual decision by the newly-weds. even my parents were left in the dark. talkative as i am, i respected their decision to keep mum about it.

i just wish they'll produce a grandchild for my parents soon. heck, that would take the pressure to procreate off my back. hahaha....as early as now, i am praying for a baby girl for them. my brother's face would turn blue from anger every time i mentioned that i wanted the baby to be as kikay as kris aquino. i'll make sure i'll be there to pamper her and to teach her how to wear pink (a color i can never wear properly). i promised my brother that, to the amusement of my sister-in-law.

well, it's so much fun to dream about babies; but not when reality sets in and we are transported to a dirty environment where the current dogma is the survival of the fittest. my brother and his wife have already long decided that if and when the time comes, they will raise their children in the province where it is still relatively peaceful and they can freely roam around the backyard.

sound decision, indeed, and i could not agree more. on second thoughts, i wondered aloud, "can you imagine a little kris aquino -- in all her pink trimmings and bling-bling -- climbing a guava tree?" i ran upstairs and locked my bedroom door before my brother decided to kill me. :)))